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11/28/2012

Ke$ha 

‘Warrior’

RCA

It’s winter, my friends. Don’t let the fair local weather fool you: Now is the season for long, cold evenings of the Great Reaping. The renewal of spring is a long, long way off, and all we have to look forward to are feelings of isolation and a lack of vitamin D. There’s a new Ke$ha album. Iggy Pop is featured in one of the songs on “Warrior,” and humanity weeps for how far we’ve fallen. Ke$ha’s brand of inane bubble gum elecro-pop is insulting. Not because it’s bad — though it is bad — but because it’s so blatant. She says things like, “The new album will feature almost no auto-tune,” — like that’s a gold-star accomplishment. The album’s first single, “Die Young,” is so uninspired it failed to impress the critical minds at Seventeen magazine. Anyone who buys this album is a masochist. Anyone who gives it as a gift should be tried at The Hague. CV

 

HIV

Cee Lo Green

‘Cee Lo’s Magic Moment’

Warner Bros

Christmas albums suck. They tend to go one of two ways: 1. The artist gets creative — either with original songs, or with unusual takes on covers and completely ruins the album in the process, or 2. They cover old standards as closely as possible, in which case, if you’ve heard one you’ve heard them all. Then there’s Cee Lo. If you absolutely need to buy a Christmas album this year, here’s your best bet. Cee Lo covers “Run Run Rudolph.” Cee Lo covers “You’re a Mean One, Mr Grinch.” Cee Lo turns in the best rendition of “All I Want For Christmas” since Mariah Carey wrote “All I Want For Christmas.” Cee Lo writes an original song (“All I Need is Love”), and performs it with the Muppets. The. Muppets. “Cee Lo’s Magic Moment” is exactly what a Christmas album should be: fun. CV

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