Gaskell's nice tits

Jon Gaskell's nice tits for power bill savings (Oct. 13) - multifarious copulation, shit-faced oblivion, bullshitting yourself, turning on the heater full blast while driving your car and gorging on fudge, cake, pie and ice cream to fatten one's ass for more cold endurance - would likely cut your energy bill in half this winter. But, the shit is going to hit the fan come the spring of 2006. You will be an obese drunk, driving a yellow cab and bullshitting yourself and everyone else. So if you ask me, Gaskell better keep his day job.

Mid-American Energy is just doing what comes natural to the corporate beast. It's maximizing profits. If your hind end freezes in their pursuit of bucks, so be it. That the company has the market all to themselves is tough shit, people. Ed Fallon pinpoints the real problem: "Politicians are on the take," and Gaskell points out this is why "we take it in the collective shorts" for health insurance, car insurance, heat, lights - hell, you name the product. All you have to do is follow the money. Where do politicians get it, and who benefits? If money is free speech (as the Supreme Court seems to say) most people in Iowa have little or nothing to say. If you are not interested in campaign finance reform, just pull down your shorts, people. Mid-American and every other bottom-line corporation, institution and entity will love you to death, bankruptcy, insanity and/or suicide.

Tom Kearney
Des Moines

Fell out of his chair

Jon Gaskell's column ("Tits for cutting your power bill," Oct. 13) was some of his best work. I nearly fell out of my chair several times while reading it. Keep up the good work and continue to be a voice for many of us.

Dennis Anderson
West Des Moines

Community input needed

I agree with Gaskell when he writes that there are many positives about Des Moines Public Schools ("Marketing, 101," Oct. 6). My two children are getting a great education. Nonetheless, how things are accomplished is also important. When stakeholders (teachers, employees, parents, community members) are constantly shut out of the decision-making process and only informed of these decisions after the fact, it is easy to see where the negativity and frustration come from. To say that the decision on recent school closings was done with community input would be stretching the truth far past the breaking point.

Sharon Walsh
Des Moines

Pulitzer material?

Since Cityview's most beloved writer Sgt. Dave Murrillo is no longer on staff, perhaps the paper's only hope for survival would be to hire Erin Crawford away from the daily newspaper. Erin's awesome and witty Valley girl-junior high writing skills combined with Jon Gaskell's ass-sucking of Des Moines' rich and powerful jet-set could possibly vault Cityview into the national scene with some of America's journalistic heavy hitters such as Tiger Beat, Seventeen and Boy's Life. Better make room on the mantel for a Pulitzer.

Johnny Trost
Booneville

On the edge of what?

If I Were Abby is very funny... ("And this may come as a huge letdown for an elderly woman like yourself, but when you die, you can't actually get better. So when you've had your applesauce, finished the Canasta tournament and are done soiling yourself, spread the word.") in a grade school kind of way. The really funny part is that Jon, Carolyn, Erin, Michael and the rest of you losers will grow up someday, soil your pants and find it written in somebody's idea of an edgy alternative. On the edge of what, pray tell?

Sharon Hall
Des Moines

Not tough on sex offenders

I believe the new law banning sex offenders from the city is not the answer. So a sex offender can't live in my city, but they can work here and come and go through here as they please. They just can't sleep here? They could be my mail carrier, the guy who mows my lawn or the person bagging my groceries. They will still have the same access to kids. The only thing that will keep offenders away from children is much, much longer sentencing, monitoring with ankle bracelets and possibly castration. Any person who re-offends should get a life sentence. If they aren't allowed to live within city limits, then they shouldn't be allowed to work here or shop here, etc. But that would never happen. So this is a ridiculous law that will accomplish nothing. We cannot and will not ever be able to keep them out of the city. Banning them from sleeping here isn't the answer, more severe punishment is.

Mary O'Neal
Des Moines

Comment on this story | Return to top