Winners

It's not often in this space that we name Des Moines Public Schools a winner. And, to be fair, the praise here belongs ultimately to the U.S. Department of Education, which just announced that it would bestow a $1.7 million grant upon 1,500 students from low-income families. The grant is dedicated to preparing students for college, and it will encourage partnerships between Des Moines schools and area colleges and universities. The award it is thought to be the biggest academic-achievement grant ever given to the district, according to Klark Jessen of Des Moines Public Schools.

Although there really are no winners in the CIETC scandal, Republicans are making themselves look pretty damn good, as more and more information about the ordeal is released. On Friday, the Legislature's sent out a press release titled, "GOP Lawmakers Reveal New CIETC Bonus Documents; Call for End to Bonuses in State Government." The document names a number of high-profile Dems (including a few Mauros and South Siders) who've allegedly been receiving CIETC bonuses for years. In the press release, Republican Ron Wieck, Senate co-chair, proclaimed, "It is absolutely outrageous how long the culture of favoritism, cronyism and nepotism has gone on at CIETC." Which translates roughly to: "The GOP doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell of winning control of the Senate this year, so we're gonna ride this CIETC thing as long and hard as we can."

Losers

As if writing about the image of Jonathan Narcisse in a thong, gold chain and sandals weren't bad enough, The Register outdid itself by publishing a frontal shot of the Des Moines activist sans shirt on the front page of its July 31 edition. In doing so, the daily violated the time-honored "no nipple" photography rule that metro and community papers have lived by. Never heard of the "no nipple" rule? We learned of it years ago from Ed Rood, former publisher of the Tri-County Times, a weekly community newspaper in Slater. Male or female, it doesn't matter. No nipples. Period. And you don't cross Ed. Unless, of course, you publish a true alternative newspaper like Cityview.

Des Moines appears to be on the verge of joining other cities that have criminalized dogs. In a recent Register story, writer Jason Clayworth reports that dogs of any breeds that have been branded "dangerous" by animal control officers could be banned from the city or euthanized, under new rules being considered by Des Moines officials. Already, pooches in the pit bull family face stricter regulations than dogs of other breeds (mandatory liability insurance and licensure, for example). While we applaud Des Moines for not following the lead of other municipalities (like Denver, which has completely banned pit bulls from city limits, and last year rounded up and killed hundreds of pits with clean records to the outcry of owners and dog lovers), we hope Des Moines continues to exercise common sense when it comes to canines. After all, bad dogs are almost always the product of bad owners. Here's an idea: Why not stiffen penalties for animal cruelty, neglect and abuse before passing tougher laws against dogs that are the victims of stupid humans?

Anyone who's ever lived in Ames knows that the university town is notorious for its poor road-construction timing. Whose bright idea was it to rip the shit out of Lincoln Way (the main drag near ISU and Campustown) not during the middle of summer, when Ames is emptier than a college kid's savings account, but right now, when all the students are moving back into town? Take a pair of sweaty, overeager parents, and shake (don't stir) with a too-cool college freshman who just wants the 'rents to leave so he can hang his Dave Matthews subway poster, man. Now add a dash of road construction on move-in day, and presto! You've got yourself a recipe for a family feud. CV

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