By Matthew Scott Hunter

‘Kinect Star Wars’

(T)

*1/2

Microsoft Game Studios/LucasArts

Xbox 360

The last 15 years have been pretty rough for self-respecting “Star Wars” fans. First there was that business with Greedo shooting first. Then came Jar Jar Binks. Now the latest addition to the expanded “Star Wars” universe will test the resolve of even the most stalwart George Lucas apologists. Since the very first glimpse of Kinect in action, we’ve been teased with the promise of a fully motion-controlled “Star Wars” game, in which battle droids crumble beneath your pantomime lightsaber swings and storm troopers are thrown reeling from the Force of your slightest gesture. But anyone who’s spent more than a few minutes with any Kinect game knows that the peripheral is not up to the task of making players feel like Jedi. The purported one-to-one movement comes with a notable lag, so you’ll constantly be waiting for your onscreen avatar to repeat your moves (when he bothers at all). In the meantime, your frustrated flailing will hardly make you feel like Obi-Wan Kenobi.

It gets worse. Like most early Wii games, the bulk of Kinect’s catalogue consists of overly simplistic mini-game collections, and “Kinect Star Wars” is no exception. In addition to the main campaign, there are unresponsive lightsaber duels, halfway decent podraces and segments in which you stomp around Tatooine settlements as a giant Rancor, destroying buildings with the coordination and finesse of an oversized toddler. But the worst offender, by far, is the dancing mini-game, in which characters once thought to be unassailably cool, like Han Solo, are forced to mimic your embarrassing hip gyrations as you dance to cringe-worthy “Star Wars” versions of contemporary pop and hip hop songs. Characters and players alike will not escape with their dignity intact. It’s enough to make the most devoted fanboy feel like his affection for “Star Wars” died a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. CV

‘South Park: Tenorman’s Revenge’

(M)

**

Other Ocean Interactive

Xbox Live Arcade

Eric Cartman may have ground up Scott Tenorman’s parents into chili and fed them to him, but it’s gamers who will feel the sting of Scott’s wrath in “Tenorman’s Revenge.” Although the game looks and sounds fantastic, with a surplus of fan service and sidescrolling gameplay that lends itself well to the 2D, paper cut-out style of the show, several poor design choices will insure that you die more often than Kenny ever did. The platforming controls feel floaty and imprecise, checkpoints are punishingly sparse and co-op gameplay demands you recruit three friends to suffer with you.

‘The Splatters’

(E)

***1/2

Microsoft Game Studios/SpikySnail Games Studio

Xbox Live Arcade

This quaint but addictive physics puzzle game tasks you to detonate bombs with suicidal blobs of sentient slime. The idea is to rupture your blobs in such a way that their titular internal goo rains down in a wide spread, activating all of the necessary color-coded explosives. Power-ups that reverse a splatter’s momentum or alter a blob’s trajectory in mid-air will put your spatial reasoning skills to the test, and vibrant visuals and catchy music ensure that you’ll be adequately mesmerized by this pleasant little time-waster.